I DID NOT GET MY MOTHER'S GENES

Or her jeans. And I'd love to have a couple of her 70s pairs.

My mom makes homes pretty. Organized and pretty. She knows things about fabrics that sound like pig latin to me. When she met BF her first reaction to "Indian" was "I have to ask him about the silk in India." What?!

My mother ... where to start ... she lives in a cute, cozy home that's two sizes too small but still manages to feel like home and smell like Christmas. She currently works at a store that if I named you'd all be jealous about (lets just say ... 40% off is a real bonus. And mom, I have my eye on a couple pieces for XMas.) She's always saying things like "you know, I understand the house wife ... it's a full time job to pick out curtains and keep a home up." To this I roll my eyes and down a glass of wine ... "sure mom, whatever you say to make yourself not want to punch out your customers."

Except ... except ... shit. I think she's right. I have made the decision to MOVE ... little known fact about moving - it follows "death of a spouse" and the #2 stressful thing to go through. With the word move comes the word DECORATE. "But I don't have time for all this, I have a job." And there it is - my mom's words.

But I'm not a housewife with kids and an excuse to quit my job (plus, let me reiterate, I love my job.) So I must decorate and declutter and budget for these expenses on the lunch break.

Here are the current photos on the google doc I have going labled "WISHES FOR APARTMENT." Note the word "wishes." We shall see what really unfolds ...

CLEANLINESS IS NEXT TO GODLINESS?

Isn't there some weirdo phrase like that? If that's true then maybe I should be an atheist.

Update on GOAL #2: Apartment has been clean for 2 days! I realize the fact that this has an ! after it is pathetic. I have a serious problem putting things away. I don't know why ... I've really thought long and hard about my childhood and what would make me this way. The only thing I can come up with (and believe me, I use this as an excuse all the time) is that I never ever had my own room ... so now that I'm a big bad grownup and have my own place, I will damn well messy it up. And no one will tell me to clean up!

Except that I'm now taking major steps to fix my brain and all its issues ... so this will no longer be an acceptable excuse. Bye, bye traumatic room-sharing memories of my sisters reading my diary and my brothers waking me up with Nerf guns pointed at my head.

LOOK WHAT I FOUND!

A site that has therapy for people like me!! 20 cures in 20 days ... hmmmmm. We shall see if I can follow through. I mean, I've always wanted to go to therapy.

http://cure.apartmenttherapy.com/2010/fall

GOAL #2

A couple years ago I had too much beer weight on and I downloaded some weird motivational thing to listen to while trying to shed the fun off. Being a fairly middle of the road american female, Oprah had something to do with it.

This is what I remember: Oprah's voice telling me to strip down naked and look at myself in the mirror. "Really look. Take in the fat. Be honest with yourself." (something to that effect) I think the point was that once naked, its all out there - you're fat.

I'm not fat. But I am messy. I am to messy what obese is to fat ... ? I will not be standing naked in front of my mirror today ... mostly because I can't get close enough. Too many clothes on the floor. Instead I will be posting a photo of my coffee table in all its glory.

GOAL #2 - CLEAN UP MY LIFE (in the organizational, clean home way)